


I Knew A Man By Sight

by Aledono



Category: Captive Prince - C. S. Pacat
Genre: 5+1 Things, Canon Compliant, Character Study, Comfort/Angst, Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Loyalty, inspired in Green but for a Season, teenage Laurent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:21:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28053807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aledono/pseuds/Aledono
Summary: It might have been usual for the Prince to catch Jord out of his guard, but it was unusual for him to surprise him; to actually make him question what he thought he knew about him and the world they lived in; to find yet another reason to follow him. Those moments were so rare, that Jord could count them with the fingers of one hand.They were so exceptional, he always kept them next to his heart.
Relationships: Jord & Laurent (Captive Prince)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 25
Collections: Captive Prince Secret Santa 2020





	I Knew A Man By Sight

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kingdomorthis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kingdomorthis/gifts).



> This the secret santa gift for kingdomorthis and I really hope they enjoy it. When I read your request I was extremely happy because it matched with what I wanted to write about. Jord is one of my favourite characters and this was the perfect excuse to work with him. Happy holidays and thank you for allowing me to write something I enjoyed so much!
> 
> I also want to thank wonderful timburtonknewmyoceans (Tumblr) for beta'ing this; and a big shout out to the organisers of the event. I had lot's of fun with it! Thank you all for all your hard work! ♥
> 
> Quotes from the books are in italics. The title comes from the poem of the same name by Henry D. Thoreau.

# I Knew A Man By Sight

or

#### Five Times Laurent Surprised Jord and one time he Surprised Laurent

It wasn't unusual for the Prince to take Jord onto his guard.

The first time it happened was when the Prince approached Jord to make him part of his Prince's Guard. Standing next to the young Prince, Jord felt foolish and inadequate, yet he took on his offer due to his loyalty for the late Prince Auguste. At that moment, Jord thought the offer was unexpected, but later he remembered how long it had been since the starburst banners flew over Arles. The Regent was taking hold of the throne and the Prince needed someone to protect him in case the Regent's rapacity would exceed his fealty. Therefore, Jord wasn't entirely surprised by the Prince's actions.

The second time was when he realized that the boorish Guard of misfits assembled by the Prince had actually something to offer to the world. All of them were skillful, tenacious and, most importantly, vehemently loyal. The Prince had chosen well and Jord knew that luck and chance had had nothing to do with it. After all, the Prince's quick mind was known to anyone who lived in the palace. It was obvious he had the ability to choose the best of what he could afford.

The third time was during their first sword practice. The Prince was skilled and made him eat both, the arena's sawdust and his overconfidence. Until then, Jord believed that the Prince was not a fighter, but now he realized that he had to become one in order to survive the Regent's machinations. Moreover, it was the natural thing for a Prince to do. After all, he had served in Sanpelier. He had served in Marlas.

Prince Laurent was like a whirlwind, quick and unpredictable until one understood his motivations. Therefore, it wasn't unusual for the Prince to take Jord onto his guard. Yet, Jord knew him well and even if it took time, he could comprehend what was behind his cruel words and actions. It might have been more usual for the Prince to catch him out of his guard, but it was unusual for him to surprise him; to actually make him question what he thought he knew about him and the world they lived in; to find yet another reason to follow him.

Those moments were so rare, that Jord could count them with the fingers of one hand.

They were so exceptional, he always kept them next to his heart.

#### 1

Jord shouldn't have been so surprised when the Prince singlehandedly erased the Council's reticence to the existence of the Prince's Guard, yet, he was. Until then, Jord thought the Prince was cunning and resolute, but not smart enough to circumvent the invisible threads his Uncle had laid throughout the castle. Still, the young man put a stop to the constant provocations of the Regent's Guard and gave the Prince's Guard the legitimacy they deserved.

The Regent never openly criticized the existence of the Prince's Guard, but Jord knew that if his guards did, it was because he instigated it. Yet, Prince Laurent had been a step ahead of his uncle and, for once, he beat him. It was a small victory, yes, but Jord was proud nevertheless.

The first time the Prince surprised Jord was when he realized that maybe one day they could overcome the Regent.

#### 2

It would be a lie to say that Jord got used to the Prince's antics. Yet, as the months went by, he became better at reading the subtle hints of his thoughts on his facial expressions. As any human, the Prince had a wide spectrum of emotions, but he guarded them as one of his best kept secrets. It seemed no one was worthy enough of his smiles or the nervous way in which he bit his lips. Of course, he tended to be much more generous with his grimaces and glares, but even those were quickly hidden in case a neutral courtier could catch a glimpse of the Prince's true nature.

Recognizing the Prince's mood was a difficult task, but Jord learned a little bit more about him every day. For instance, he realized that reading his expressions was not a matter of perception, but of speed. The Prince was still young, and he used to show his emotions, even if it was for a fraction of a second. Jord also knew the Prince was getting better at hiding them. It was only a matter of time before his real thoughts became indecipherable so Jord tried his best to gain information from his entire body language instead of just his face. For all he knew, one day it could be impossible to read the latter.

And so, Jord continued to observe. If he wanted to keep his place in the Guard, he would have to learn how to differentiate whenever the Prince was angry and when he was absolutely furious. What was more important perhaps, was the way he could even recognize the spare, blissful moments when he was actually in a good mood.

The second time the Prince surprised Jord was one of those rare moments.

They were visiting Aquitart, the only place where the Prince felt free enough to wonder around the city. That day, the Prince and three of his men were riding through the main street with the townspeople hovering around them. The Prince was grateful for their loyalty and he responded to their attentions with kind words and soft smiles. Yet, Jord could see on the stiffness of his body and the fiddly trotting of his mare that the Prince was extremely uncomfortable. Jord believed it was because the young man was not used to the attention. The Prince would think twice before visiting the town once again.

Still, when an old lady offered the Prince a little basket with crystalized oranges, the young man smiled and blinked his eyes with endearment. His pale cheeks blushed from the simple gift and his beautiful eyes seemed to clear up like the purest blue sky. For once, the Prince seemed genuinely happy and excited. He looked young and lovely and how he was always meant to look.

The smile didn't last long, but his good mood extended throughout the entire day.

The second time the Prince surprised Jord was when he realized how different things would have been if they hadn't lost so much at Marlas.

#### 3

The winds changed in Arles the moment Marlas was lost, but Jord couldn't have imagined that its speed would steadily increase throughout the years. Now, with the Prince about to turn eighteen years old and closer to his coming of age rather than to the loss of his brother, a hurricane was stirring. The shadows of the regency already covered every single corner of the capital and Jord feared it was a matter of time for it to consolidate enough to stop the Prince from taking his rightful place on the throne.

For a time, Jord believed that the Regent planned to rule Vere through the Prince, but every day the young man drifted farther away from him and it was obvious to anyone on the court that the chance of Laurent abiding to his uncle's will was close to none. The Regent had also seen this (probably much earlier than Jord did), and so he began using other techniques. Taking advantage of the Prince's cold and poisonous character, he successfully convinced half the court that he was spoiled and rotten. A big lie, but one that could easily be played in a trial to deem the Prince unqualified to rule.

The Prince did his best to prove the court that his uncle was wrong, that he was intelligent and capable, and even pleasant if he really had to be, but he usually ended up trapped in a cage of lies and contradictions. After all, it was easy for the Regent to claim that the Prince was neglectful for not participating in the Council meetings right after banning him from attending.

The situation was dire, but at least for now they had a chance to overcome the Regent. He was vicious and the loyalty that surrounded him was forged either by greed and corruption or complete and blinded gullibility. Both bonds were weak and nothing compared to the pure allegiance that the Prince stirred on his followers. He had experienced his magnetism himself, and Jord was certain that the entire country would follow suit if they ever got to know the real Prince.

Unfortunately, the Regent also knew this, and Jord feared that his plans for keeping the Prince away from the crown were growing bolder by the day. He was certain that it wouldn't take long for the Regent to seek a more permanent way to abolish the Prince's right to the throne. That was why Jord and the rest of the Guard had to keep their eyes wide open. They didn't know when or how the Regent would launch his first direct attack, but Jord knew it was just a matter of time.

It was extremely tiring to remain alert at all times, so when the Prince announced his yearly visit to Aquitart, Jord was relieved to know they could spend several weeks away from the Regent's court. The preparations were arranged as usual, and so once they reached three fourths of their trip, they were set to spend the night in Nesson-Eloy.

No one was surprised or concerned when the Prince announced he would go for a ride before continuing their journey. The Prince left the inn at dawn with two of his guards by his side and assured the others they would be back in an hour, but three hours went by and he was still out of sight. Jord feared for the worst. Perhaps the Regent had taken advantage of their recklessness in order to assassinate the Prince in guise of a robbery, or perhaps the Prince had been kidnapped and was in desperate need for help. Both situations were dire and Jord couldn't help but fear for the worst.

The Guard spread throughout the city and its outskirts hoping to find a lead toward their Prince, but Jord and his group came back to the inn empty handed. He had to wait for twenty tortuous minutes for Rochert and Guarin to reach the meeting place and Jord's heart dropped to his stomach when he saw that there were two other men on their horses. Rochert was riding with Huet, who was drowsy and confused and had a nasty injury on his head. His forehead and left eye were still bleeding as one of the soldiers helped him dismount and it was a miracle he didn't pass out the moment his feet touched the floor. Yet, his situation was much better than the one of his companion, Asce. He was dead, wounded by several blows on the head and a final, clean cut on his throat.

Jord's blood ran cold as he realized the two soldiers were the ones that had accompanied the Prince.

"What happened?! Where's the Prince?" he asked.

"He was taken," Rochert grumbled. "Huet was too stunned to talk, but Orlant and the others followed their trail toward the mountains."

"Vaskian riders?" someone asked.

"Or someone meant to look like them," murmured Jord as he approached his mount. "How long is their lead?"

"Huet couldn't tell. At least an hour."

The men rose to their stirrups. Four of them would remain in the city in order to send word to the others and the rest would ride to the mountains. Jord could only hope they could reach the Prince in time.

* * *

"What the fucking hell happened in here?!"

The Guard rode for two hours before reaching the mountainous labyrinth of Vask. There, it took them another half an hour to meet their companions and another thirty minutes to find five horses and the Prince's mare resting in front of a rundown tent. The mare neighed as she noticed the Guard approaching, but other than that a deadly silence covered the mountain pass. They couldn't see what was going on inside the tent and so they decided to launch a surprise attack hoping they weren't too late.

Yet, once Orlant ripped an opening into the tent, the soldiers found three dead bodies lying on the dirt floor while the Prince looked at them with boredom and annoyance. It was a unique look on someone who was still tightly bound to a chair.

"What took you so long?"

Used and unbothered by the Prince's harsh words, Jord sighed with relief. The attackers had been nothing but a group of Vaskian men that, undoubtedly, didn't even know who they had taken hostage.

"What happened to them?" asked Jord as he untied the Prince.

"I made them fight over who would be the first one to fuck me."

Orlant barked with laughter and slapped Jord's back with so much strength he lost his breath.

"I believe that!" said Orlant, and the rest of the Guard had to agree. The Prince was beautiful and anyone would kill for the chance to lay with him… anyone stupid enough to put his dick in a meat grinder, that is.

"What happened to Asce and Huet?"

Silence covered the tent once again.

"Asce is dead, your highness", answered Jord. "Huet was badly injured, but I think he'll survive."

It only took one second for the Prince to nod and to lead himself out of the tent, "Let's go. This place reeks of booze."

As they recovered the Prince's belongings, Jord gave a final glance to the men laying on the floor.

The third time the Prince surprised Jord was when he realized that the young man didn't need his protection as much as he had expected, nor as much as he yearned for.

#### 4

The gale unleashed in Arles once the Prince turned twenty. Despite the Regent's best efforts, his nephew was well and alive and even managed to keep a small, but prominent group of courtiers by his side. This was against his best interest and suddenly the situation got to the point where Jord feared that keeping the Prince alive until his twenty first birthday wouldn't be enough. The Regent's control over the Council was almost complete. Only two of the councillors weren't openly antagonistic toward the Prince and even then, they used to be swayed by the Regent's poisonous words against his nephew.

There still hadn't been any direct attacks against the Prince, but even the young man admitted that the chances of it happening increased by the day. He and his Guard couldn't be cautious enough, and they couldn't trust the Regent even if his threats seemed open and bold enough for half the court to notice his intentions.

He seemed particularly interested in sending the Prince to serve on the border. It would be easier to kill him far away from Arles and it would be beneficial to his position to declare the Prince a martyr that died protecting his country, just like his brother. That way less people would challenge his ascension and, if he got lucky, he could even use it as an excuse to declare war against Akielos.

The Prince did whatever he could to shy away from what the Regent deemed his duty, but his reluctance to serve was damaging his already tainted reputation. Yet, he managed to keep his head up high, conducting himself with pride and doing his best to keep his few followers by his side.

Those were difficult times, but even then Jord couldn't have imagined the upcoming hurricane embarked in a ship carrying dozens of Akielon slaves.

No one was surprised when the Regent sent Councillor Guion to Akielos. With Theomedes and the prince-killer dead, the country was unstable and vulnerable. Moreover, the resentment against the southern country was still fresh in the Veretians' hearts, and it was certain that most people would support an invasion. It was, without a doubt, the perfect moment to brew an attack against their longtime enemies.

As any other Veretian, Jord would have encouraged his intentions if it weren't because, when Guion came back, he brought an entourage of slaves. It made no sense for them to be in Arles and even less sense for the Regent to keep them as slaves.

"It would be an offense to disdain the gift from our new allies", he said. "They shall remain slaves because that is what they are meant to be and they shall be treated as such because that is how they expect to be treated."

Jord felt pity for the men and women who were so dehumanized. Even the Regent of Vere considered them a 'gift'. Yet, most courtiers were excited to have the foreigners in the palace. They were beautiful, docile and exotic; they were nothing like the boisterous pets from the court. Jord thought it was a shame that King Aleron's court had degraded into something like this, but it couldn't be helped. Why should the courtiers keep themselves from debauchery, when the Regent himself committed the most disgusting acts of the court?

Yet, the presence of the slaves wasn't as worrying as the fact that the Regent chose one of them as a gift for the Prince. Of course, he chose the oddest one of all, a big, pretentious and clumsy slave; one clearly never trained to serve. He was smart, but had a terrible sense of self preservation, something that he should've had if he wanted to survive Arles. Jord believed the man ended up in such a situation because he was a former soldier serving under Prince Damianos. He must have been particularly loyal; otherwise, the bastard king wouldn't have gone as far as to send him to Vere. For a proud Akielon soldier, serving his former enemies would be a fate worse than death.

The Prince must have also suspected the slave's origin, because he took any chance he had to make him pay in the name of his former commander. For all they knew, the slave could have served at Marlas. He was old enough and, Jord suspected, skillful enough. If the Prince didn't kill him the same night he came to the palace, it was only because he knew he would be severely reprimanded by the Regent. That didn't stop the Prince from whipping him to the verge of death, though.

Unfortunately, that was a mistake. The Regent took advantage of the Prince's misstep and used it as an excuse to forfeit his lands, troops and income. Up to that point, Jord hadn't disliked the slave any more than he would dislike any Akielon soldier, but he dared to bemoan the Regent for something he brought upon himself. Jord couldn't blame him for wanting to steal a caress from the Prince's naked skin, but he could blame him for not controlling himself. He gambled the Prince's crown and his own life because he wanted to fuck the pretty Veretian prince.

Once the Regent dictated the punishment for spoiling the gift from Akielos, the Prince was forced to be civil to the slave and they began what seemed a short-lived truce. The slave became more obedient, and the Prince never finished what he started at the cross.

Despite the apparent peace between them, the sense of dread didn't seem to ease. The Regent had taken a big step against his nephew and it was only logical for him to make the last strike as soon as possible.

The moment came some days after the Vaskian delegation arrived at the castle, during the boar hunt. Jord suspected something was off the moment they joined the Prince at the stables. There, the young man was brushing his mare's mane while whispering kind words to the animal. Usually she was serene and obedient, but today she was restless and reluctant. Jord had never seen her like this.

"What is it? Is she ill?"

The Prince looked sideways to where the tardy courtiers were preparing to mount.

"It's nothing. She's throwing a tantrum because I didn't bring any apples with me today. She'll continue to until the hunt is over."

Jord nodded but gave the mare a last glance before the Prince mounted her and rode her toward the meeting point. She was already sweating and the Prince had to press the spurs to stop her from fidgeting. A sour taste filled up Jord's mouth.

Something terrible was about to happen.

* * *

Jord was not surprised when, late at night, the Prince asked him to escort him to the royal horse cemetery, where his mare was buried several hours earlier. He hadn't been near the Prince during the hunt, but he wasn't surprised when he heard they had to put the mare down. She had been fatally wounded by the boar, they said. The Prince had ruined her, they said.

But Jord knew how capable the animal had been and what an excellent rider the Prince was. What happened that day wasn't due to an accident or negligence. Something had been wrong with the mare even before she left the stable. Now she laid next to the late Prince's bay horse. There still wasn't a stone to commemorate her, but Jord was sure the Prince had already commissioned someone for the work.

"I'm sorry for your loss, your highness."

Jord knew the Prince disliked every human being in Arles, but he also knew how much he cared about the animals that lived inside the palace walls. He was especially devoted to his mare. She had been a gift from his brother, the last living memory he had of him.

"Why?", he said without losing his composure. It was as if they were staring at a boring patch of grass instead of the grave of a beloved pet. "It was just a horse."

"What happened?"

The Prince raised his head to make sure no one had followed them. The horse cemetery was a good place to be secretive, though. It laid on an open field with little to no place to hide.

"She was poisoned," he finally answered. "I was meant to have a terrible accident during the hunt, but she fought until the very end."

"She was a brave one, your highness," he nodded. "May I ask why didn't you stop the hunt?"

"She was going to die anyway. Besides, someone else would've been blamed." Jord raised an eyebrow. "I doubt Torveld would've been willing to take a retinue of dead slaves with him."

Jord exhaled and lowered his gaze towards the grave.

"I don't think he would have," he said after a long pause. "Can you imagine? After all those tedious conversations you had to share with the Patran prince? What a waste of time."

The Prince didn't smile, but at least Jord managed to disappear the frown on his face.

"You were right," he murmured. "It was a matter of time for my uncle to raise his game."

Jord was surprised it took him so long to accept the fact that his uncle wanted him dead.

"It's only ten months until your ascension."

"Yes," he agreed and, for once, he allowed a tinge of emotion to flow from his words. It was pain. "It seems we'll have to raise our stakes too."

Jord was surprised he was so reluctant to even think about killing his uncle.

The fourth time the Prince surprised Jord was when he realized he still saved some affection for the man that had done everything he could to destroy him.

#### 5

It was easy for Jord to remain loyal after he discovered Aimeric's betrayal. It wasn't because he expected any kind or retribution or because he was hoping the Prince would show leniency for his mistake. He remained loyal because he wanted to do everything he could to protect and serve his Prince. The Regent was vile, yes, and the mere thought of him bearing the crown was revolting, but the Prince was much more than the lesser evil. He was devoted to his people, brilliant, and a peacemaker despite his cruel words and biting demeanor. He had experienced what war could do to people, to families. Jord would do everything he could to stop the bloodshed that the Regent seemed to enjoy.

Despite his demotion, despite the ache of his heart, it was easy for Jord to go into battle on the fields of Hellay. It felt good to finally raise their swords against the regency. Even if the man he hated the most wasn't on the field. Jord fought bravely and did his best to earn a victory for his Prince.

Hellay, Jord realized later, had been easy.

Because remaining loyal was much more difficult once he discovered that his new Captain was the prince-killer.

Of course, it hadn't been the Prince's fault. It had been that treacherous Damianos who lied ever since he arrived in Arles. He took advantage of the Prince, taught him strategy, helped him improve his Akielon, and prepared him for their first battle against the regency. He _fucked_ him. He did all that despite the fact that they were in that mess because of _him_ . He killed Auguste and, with him, the hope for Laurent to remain a studious, kind young man. Damianos threw him right into the Regent's claws and now he reached for him as he was his savior. He was more monstrous now than when he pierced the late Prince with his sword. He was despicable, and Jord wished for him to disappear forever. He wished Prince Laurent never had to learn the truth. He wished they could go back to how they were before Damianos, just the Prince and his Guard.

Nevertheless, he chose to remain loyal because Damianos was part of the Prince's Guard as much as Jord was, and the Guard always fought fiercely to defeat the Prince's enemies. Laurent needed him that day and Jord knew, deep inside, that they had made it that far because of him. He knew they couldn't part from him yet.

Ravenel fell and Damianos took Jord's place as Captain. It hurt to let go his badge, but it didn't hurt as much as knowing that his lover was a traitor and that the Prince's lover was a liar. Yet, he remained loyal because Damianos promised he would leave the following day and, hopefully, Laurent would never have to experience the same pain Jord felt at Hellay.

It had always been like that, Jord realized. He had always wanted to protect the Prince, whether it was from his uncle, pesky courtiers, or the prince-killer. That was what pushed him forward, what gave him a purpose, and what helped him to remain loyal to a man that seemed to have the entire world against him.

Jord remained loyal after his lover and Damianos' betrayals mostly because he knew the Prince had nothing to do with them. If anything, he had been as wronged as he was and he wasn't at fault for other people's decisions.

But then night fell and Laurent took his own decision. He chose to unleash his wrath toward Aimeric. The torment was so cruel and vicious that Jord asked himself if the man he had sworn allegiance to really deserved it. How could he have said such things with such confidence? Without remorse? Jord had thought Laurent was better than that.

As a soldier, Aimeric started as petulant and inexperienced, but the farther they were from the capital, the more he changed for the better. He humbled, he trained even harder than the others, and he made Jord proud. Aimeric wasn't like the other spoiled courtiers back in Arles, he believed that even now. He was a fourth son, beautiful and capable, yet neglected by his father and brothers. His mother was kind, but Aimeric strived for recognition nonetheless, and when the Regent visited Fortaine and offered it to him, he must have felt one of the luckiest boys in Arles.

 _I bet you were easy._ Laurent said. _A few compliments, a little attention…_

Laurent knew how difficult it had been for Aimeric, yet he pierced his heart with his words. He understood the reasons behind his betrayal and yet he destroyed him. Aimeric took the wrong decision, yes, but he didn't deserve so much cruelty.

Jord knew he would remember Aimeric's tears and blood for the rest of his life. He would never forgive the Regent for taking advantage of the lonely, sweet boy of Fortaine. He wondered if he would ever forgive Laurent for rubbing salt on the wound that Aimeric carried for so many years.

And then the morning came. The Prince showed up at the barracks and barked several orders; none of them were for Jord to be discharged. He and five other soldiers were to escort the slave —Damianos— to the border. Jord faced him almost one hour later, freed of his bounds except for a golden shine on his wrist, anxious and distressed and yet ready to return to his country. Jord accepted that Damianos wasn't as terrible as he thought. He had fought with them; he gave them a great victory at Hellay. He stood up for Aimeric and himself.

The Prince knew the slave as a brave, intelligent man- one of the few people he had ever trusted. The previous night had been their last together, the Prince had wanted to make the most of the little time they had and Jord and Aimeric cut their moment short. The thought of Aimeric's betrayal and his lover's abandonment took a toll on him, and he reacted with more harshness than usual. Jord was still hurt, but he knew one day he would be able to forgive Laurent. For a brief moment, it seemed that everything would turn for the better. It was time to move forward. Jord would make sure to do it next to his Prince.

Such were his thoughts until the Regent's herald brought a challenge and the severed head of a young, beautiful boy. Until Damianos followed the Prince back into the fortress. Until he received Aimeric's last words written on a white sheet of paper still stained with his blood.

Jord's life hadn't been easy, but never before had he experienced so much pain. He felt more than broken, hollow. Part of him couldn't believe what had happened. A few hours ago Aimeric was still alive. Jord had even managed to steal a swift caress before the guard locked him up in his room. He had been soft and warm, just like that night they spent together. Now he was cold and pale; his wide, clear eyes had closed forever and his shy, hesitant smiles would never decorate his face again.

Jord felt numb, devoid of anything but the sense of loss. Aimeric had been trapped, exposed to his worst fears, and he convinced himself that ending his life had been his only way out. The Regent was responsible for Aimeric's demise, but it was Laurent who gave him the final push. Jord's resolution crumbled, and if he remained in Ravenel, it was only because part of him knew the Prince was the only one capable of stopping the Regent. He wanted to destroy the monster that caused so much pain, but he was unsure he could serve someone who was just as cruel.

_Are you going to leave his service?_ Damianos asked. 

Jord couldn't answer him.

He was so unsure about his future that he barely reacted when the Akielons took Ravenel. They disarmed him, brought him to King Damianos, and when he got nothing out of it, they sent him to the dungeons with the rest of the Veretian soldiers.

Exhausted, Jord sat down on the filthy floor of his shared prison. Damianos had hoped the Veretians would fight with them at Charcy. It made no sense for the prince-killer to make such demand, and even if he knew the Prince needed all the help he could get, Jord couldn't manage to care.

Aimeric was dead and so was Jord's faith in Laurent. His loyalty was shattered, and dying in Charcy for the sake of Laurent or Damianos was out of the question. He knew he could change his mind later, but for now he chose to close his eyes and rest his head against the cold stone walls as his companions cursed Damianos for his deception.

His thoughts sent him back to Aimeric.

He imagined the last days before they left Arles, the Regent's empty promises and sweet words, and Aimeric's determination and devotion. He had been abandoned for a long time; he would do anything to earn back what he thought was the love of the older man, even if it meant committing treason against the crown.

Jord couldn't understand why Laurent had no mercy on a man that was so similar to him. The Prince had also been young, soft, and naïve. It would have been easy to convince him to do anything after his brother's passing. Jord knew it would have been difficult for the Regent to ignore the temptation. He had seen enough of his pets to know what his tastes were like. Laurent would have fit them all with his big, blue eyes, soft short hair, and rosy, rounded cheeks. He would have been an easy target for the Regent if only he hadn't been his nephew.

_He wouldn't take you back. You're too old._

Suddenly, Jord felt an invisible hand taking grip on his heart.

_Thick-voiced and rough-cheeked, you'd make him sick._

His stomach lurched and his eyes opened with fear as droplets of cold sweat started covering his forehead and nape.

 _Pretty peach._ He had said. _I bet you were a peach of a little boy. A pretty peach._

It would have been so easy. Laurent would wake up in fear after a nightmare where Damianos cut his brother with his blade. He would hurry to his uncle's room and he would be there with open arms and two cups of wine. He would comfort him, make him feel loved. No one would say anything because it was natural for them to spend the night together. After all, they only had each other.

_I hate to see you grown up like this._ The Regent said. _When you were such a lovely boy._

Jord gagged with disgust —his stomach still empty for anything else— and held himself as one of his friends patted him on the back. They asked him something, but he couldn't understand their words.

How could Jord have been so blind? How could anyone? That was the reason Laurent always rejected wine, why he never took on a pet, why he never allowed anyone to touch him, and why he still yearned for his uncle's approval. The Regent laid his filthy hands on the young Prince while he was still mourning, and now he wanted to steal his birthright from him. He was a monster, and yet Laurent did his best to put an end to his atrocities. After all that had happened to him, he chose to fight his uncle. He kept his head up high and remained loyal to the starburst emblem. Jord wished Aimeric had chosen a similar path; he wished Nicaise had been lucky enough to survive it.

The fifth time the Prince surprised Jord was when he realized how strong, brave, and lucky he had been. Many others had failed to survive the Regent, but Laurent still had a chance to succeed. It was up to Damianos and the Guard to help him.

Jord heard a distant voice and he raised his head. Rochert was standing next to him looking more annoyed than concerned.

"You look like shit. Should I ask for help?"

Jord shook his head and stood up with the help of his friend. He walked to the center of the cell and got ready to address his companions. If they wanted to stop the Regent, they would have to win Charcy.

They would have to fight.

#### +1

Jord and his companions were sent to the Veretian camp shortly after the battle of Charcy. They were tired and wounded, but also proud of their achievement. Damianos was a good general and his army was disciplined and brave. Jord knew that the twenty Veretians by his side made little difference, but they kept their honor and fought their countrymen for the sake of their Prince. Jord knew it was still too early to celebrate, but the Prince always taught him to enjoy the small victories.

Funny how something as monumental as the battle of Charcy could be described as a small victory.

The Prince's Guard was occupied treating their wounds while keeping a keen eye on the soldiers of Ravenel. They hadn't fought with them, and they feared they would do something stupid regardless of Guymar's orders. The whole camp seemed uneasy, disoriented after the visit of the prince-killer and scared of how the Prince would react once he discovered the true identity of his lover.

Jord wasn't particularly nervous, though. By then, he knew the Prince would choose to remain close to Damianos. He had an army and a Veretian fort, the Prince needed him in order to face his uncle, and he would make amends with the Akielons for the sake of his own future. Jord was unsure of how he could enforce peace between the rivaling nations, but he had no doubt he would do it. He always had a plan for everything.

"Jord." He turned to the tired voice that called his name. It was Guymar. "The Prince wants to see you."

Jord nodded, and after leaving some instructions to Rochert, he made his way to the main tent of the camp. He tried not to think about the grim faces of his companions, who stared at him like he was marching toward the gallows. He doubted the Prince would demote him now —he had the chance to do it back at Ravenel— and he was certain he wouldn't want to talk about Damianos. Perhaps, he believed, the Prince was in a bad mood and wanted to lash into someone.

Jord could take it. Maybe. It couldn't be as bad as it was in Ravenel. Could it?

Once at the Prince's tent, he was announced by a soldier Jord didn't know. The Prince replied in a calm, steady voice which meant that he was keeping himself under control. For now.

He found the Prince sitting in front of a desk covered with documents. He slowly rose his head as he turned slightly into Jord's direction. He noticed his right arm resting on his lap, the ink stain on his left hand, and the mismatched color of his doublet and trousers. Jord understood then why he hadn't shown up at Charcy. He must have had his own battle back at Fortaine. There was a wound on his shoulder, one deep enough for it to bleed through his previous doublet.

For a moment, Jord wondered if he should kneel, but he decided against it. The Prince never demanded such courtesies when they were by themselves. Things might have changed now, but he wanted to keep the appearance of normalcy.

"Guymar told me you convinced the others to fight at Charcy."

Jord frowned. For a moment he thought the Prince repelled the idea of his Guard fighting side by side with the prince-killer, but he quickly dismissed the notion. The Prince would have paid any price to shame his uncle at Charcy. Lending his men to his new ally was nothing but expected.

"It was our duty."

"Damianos," the name seemed to resound inside the tent five times before waning. "The prince-killer was more than willing to sacrifice his men for my sake. You weren't needed."

At that moment, Jord understood why he was summoned before the Prince.

"It was the right thing to do, sir. We are your Guard."

Laurent frowned and stared at him intently, as if he was looking at a wooden puzzle he was incapable of solving. He was confused, taken aback because he couldn't understand why the man he eviscerated three days ago would risk so much for him. Jord had seen him doing this before. He was used to insults, attacks, but even now he was hesitant to receive help from others. He didn't seem to believe he deserved it.

_Used goods are not appealing unless they are something worth using._

Jord knew Laurent considered himself unworthy of praise because of his uncle, but only now did he understand the extent of his belief.

 _My uncle is discriminating. Not like Jord, who'll take a middle-aged man's sloppy seconds and treat it like it's worth something._

Before, Jord thought those words were against Aimeric, but now he knew that they were just a reflection of how he saw himself.

His heart ached.

"I know it is hard for you to believe it, Laurent", he said in what he knew was a stretch of his liberties. "But you are a good man. You've made mistakes, yes, but you still deserve loyalty and respect." Laurent opened his eyes in disbelief and, for a change, he didn't conceal his expression right away. "You deserve to be loved, Laurent. Many people around you believe it, and I wished you could believe it too."

He purposefully avoided the name of the former slave, but by the looks of it, the Prince figured it out himself. Only that could explain the sudden rosiness of his cheeks, and the quick fluttering of his eyelashes. Jord thought he had never looked so beautiful.

It took five eternal seconds for the Prince to regain his self-control.

"You're dismissed."

Jord nodded and prepared his leave.

The first time Jord surprised the Prince was when he made him believe for the first time in years that, perhaps, he also deserved to be happy.

**Author's Note:**

> Uff, I have to say, this was tough! I've just started writing fics in English and I definitely want to do it more so this will be a tough learning curve for me. Please have patience with me.
> 
> As I mentioned earlier, I absolutely love Jord. I liked him on the first two books, but after the Ravenel incident, I thought we wouldn't see much more of him. I was pleasantly surprised when he showed up in Charcy, but I still thought he would be put aside for the rest of the trilogy. And he kinda did, but then he went all the way to Ios with Laurent and then Kingsmeet happened and... wow. I fell in love with him the moment he wanted to kill Damianos for coming back without Laurent. It made me think a lot about him, his loyalty and why he followed Laurent so vehemently. I thought there was more between him and Laurent aside from the unrequited love latent throughout the story. There was respect and a strong desire to protect someone who, at first glimpse didn't need any help. 
> 
> Jord is quite imperfect. He was blinded by Aimeric (someone so similar to Laurent), he basked with his deference and, as with Laurent, he wanted to protect him despite of what he had done. Yet, he soon understood the situation and, as always, he chose to follow the one who he believed in the most. I think one of the reasons he did this was because he finally understood what happened to Laurent.
> 
> I love the parallels between Aimeric, Nicaise and Laurent and I think anyone close enough to them would end up seeing what makes them so similar. They were all victims of the Regent and all of them have different endings. It is a pity that only one of them became a happy one.
> 
> If you enjoyed this work, but you can also speak Spanish, please allow me to self-promote my pseudonym A. Kozani. I've just e-published a m/m novel ("Concedido") and I would be very grateful if you gave it a chance. More info in my [blog](https://a-kozani.com/libros/).
> 
> And so, I leave you. I thank you for giving this story a chance. It's quite different to what I usually write (comedy), but hope you enjoyed it! 
> 
> Have lovely, safe holidays full of wonderful food, joy and presents! May the following year be much better than this one.


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